Cold Sores and Partners. How to tell them
Cold Sore Herpes: Why and How to Inform your Partner
Understandably, relationships have different levels of commitment and trust. While many partners feel very comfortable discussing every issue with their partners, it’s the case for some. Nevertheless, we should never put our partners at risk of any diseases. This includes oral herpes, which, contrary to common opinion, poses more risk than cold sores and partners would suffer.
Admittedly, it could be embarrassing to develop cold sores while dating. Still, it’s not a sufficient reason not to inform your mutual partner concerning the contagious health condition. Even when you are already recovering, cold sores are highly contagious, and you may put your companion at the risk of infections, including sexually transmitted diseases.
From discussing some important facts about cold sores, the importance of informing your partner about the infection, and how to inform to go about it, this article is written to help you escape the barrier limiting you from coming clean to your partner. Enjoy reading!
Cold Sores and Partners: Crucial Facts to Know
- Herpes simplex virus 1 (HSV-1) is responsible for cold sores, while herpes simplex virus 2 causes genital herpes.
- Approximately 65% of adults , <49 years, in the global population carry around HSV-1.
- According to Centers for Diseases Control and Prevention (CDC), about 6 out of every 6000 people are affected by cold sores yearly. From this population, 32% are likely to experience relapse caused by fever, stress, and other causes.
- Cold sores emerge gradually as a single watery blister on the mouth or lip or as multiple blisters that consolidate into a group. The blisters may take close to 14 days before the commencement of active healing. In the meanwhile, it could be painful, while there is also the chance of spreading it via direct, non-sexual contact.
Cold Sores: The importance of informing your partner
First off, not many infections are as extremely contagious as the herpes virus. Aside from the risk of transmitting the infection, having HSV-1 infection means there is a chance of infecting your companion with genital herpes via oral sex. This is possible because cold sore herpes can spread from the face to the genital as effectively as HSV-2 can spread from the genitals to the mouth. All it requires is an engagement between one skin and another.
Furthermore, there is an increased risk of sexually transmitted disease when you have open sores. The reason is that the opened blisters can serve as an entrance for the virus or bacteria to move into the body. As for HIV, it is capable of promoting other infections by offering immune cells that a particular virus prefers as a target.
Thus, you are encouraged not to have a second thought about informing your partners about any cold sore symptoms or history that you have. This includes other sexually transmitted infections in the past. While this could sound awkward, it enables both of you to consider an STD screening from your medical expert or not.
Informing your partner
Health issues could be a difficult discussion before sex with your partner. However, there is a higher chance of strengthening your relationship by basing it on the truth. Several people are willing to take risks for affection and love. When communication is open and based on truth in a relationship, partners are less likely to blame another if they ever develop herpes while in a relationship. Consider the following sample script to engage your partner in health issue discourse.
You: “I really like you. But before we go any further into this, I want to tell you that I may have a cold sore.”
Partner: “So?”
You: “Well, they’re contagious and caused by a herpes virus, and I feel it’s important to inform someone that I’m interested in dating to know before kissing or sleeping with them.”
Partner: “Cold sores are herpes?”
You: “Yes, they are.”
Partner: “I had no idea. My ex often has them, but I don’t know what it means for me.
You: “Well, it is possible to spread the herpes virus via kissing and oral sex. I prefer to practice safe oral sex. But, it’s not 100% perfect.”
Partner: “We didn’t use condoms for oral sex – do I have it already?”
You: “Not necessarily. It is not every time you have sex that the virus is transmitted. However, it is safer to undergo a test to clear all doubts.”
Partner: “Oh, herpes has a test?
You: “Yeah. With a blood test, you can determine if you have ever been infected – even without symptoms. What do you think?
From here, let your partner make their own decision without any pressure or coercion. Give them to think about it if need be. While you cannot control your partner, you can manage your sexual decisions to protect yourself.
Cold Sores and Partners: a Final Note
Finally, know that it’s not unusual to get infected during oral sex. If this happens, endeavour to speak with your partner about the development. Rather than putting the blame on your intimate companion, you should educate them about the infection. It’s very likely that they are not aware of the risk of transmitting herpes during oral sex. In this case, suppressive or barrier therapy are options to consider to lower the risk greatly.
